Wednesday, May 22, 2013

How to Homeschool a Teen Perfectionist...

The full title I wanted for this post:

How to Homeschool a Teen Perfectionist Who Lacks Self-Confidence and Is Also Likely Gifted (So Not Only Has Very High Expectations of Herself But Also Makes Questions Far More Complicated Than They Are Intended to Be)

I don't actually have any content for this post, unfortunately. Looking for answers...


  1. Tried to post a comment on this a few days ago but it disappeared into the ether :(

    You could have been writing about my son here! Having mostly homeschooled, he is now doing a distance learning course to earn qualification for university entrance. Maths is fine, but working on the assessments for other subjects he grinds to a halt whenever it isn’t clear exactly what is wanted and whenever he sees the task as difficult. He is reluctant to start on something while he has doubts, even if the doubts relate to just one small element of the assessment. This leads to lots of procrastination, and time passing without progress.

    I don’t think lack of preparation or lack of ability is the problem in my son’s case (although perhaps there is a lack of time management skills); I think it is lack of confidence, as you suggest in your daughter’s case too. I try to convince him to jump in and have a go at a rough draft answer without worrying about whether it is the right answer or a good answer, as this might give him something that can be refined into a good answer, or at the very least will spark ideas about how to answer the question.

    I’m keen to hear what approaches you try and how they work for you and your daughter!

    1. Hi Lisia! You have described in more detail my daughter. There is a mental block if things can't be just right. It's like it's seen in a black-or-white manner: it's good (aka perfect) or it's not any good.

      Time management isn't the problem, I've realized: it's stress management and perfectionism. It's tough and I'll be researching things more this summer in terms of dealing with perfectionism and stress management. I will post things I find! (Look up _gifted stress management_ . We are not alone!!)

  2. Thanks, Daisy! I think building stress management skills will be very helpful. Have found one article to start with, about younger kids but still relevant. I plan to show my son some of the ideas.